Question Authority=LibertyQuestion History=Prison

Boy, oh boy...Gotta hand it to our freedom-loving Austrian friends.

Yesterday, an Austrian court convicted British author David Irving to three years in the klink for denying the holocaust in speech and in print. Just knowing this subversive and dangerous criminal will be behind bars for three years should make all Jews feel that much safer. But if you think that's bad, wait 'til you hear these criminal horror stories...

Morgan Spurlock (that's the guy from Super Size Me, yeah...) will be going on trial soon in France next month for his defamatory statements of French food and culture. It seems in one of his books he referred to a baguette as a "...Long breadstick..." and has violated French laws concerning Defamation of Pastries and Baked Goods.

In San Francisco and Portland, OR, city councils are trying to pass laws making it illegal to deny the Theory of Human-Caused Global Warming. A first-time denier would be sentenced to scrubbing smog residue off city vehicles with a toothbrush. Repeat offenders would be required to wear a mask and breathe pure ozone for one week. Those offenders considered too vile to rehabilitate would buried alive to become one with the Earth - a process smugly coined 'EarthBortion'...

In Los Angeles, there's been a law in effect since about 1982 which makes it a crime to deny that Edward Van Halen is, indeed, the finest guitar player on the planet. The only punishment option for these Deniers of Guitar-Godness is to be pummelled senseless by a crowd of mulleted, leather-jacket-with-arm-fringes-wearin', Jordache skin-tight-jeans-clad, Trans-Am drivin', floppy-tongued-Reebok-high-tops-shod metalheads. Aw, Caught In A Mosh...

And lastly, right here in Cleveburg: Don't even THINK about denyin' LeBron James status as the KING! The CHOSEN ONE!! GOD'S GIFT TO BASKETBALL!!!
His mom might just run yo' ass over with her Gold-Plated Hummer...

So I say let's all heave a hefty mug of bitter beer to our more enlightened counterparts from the urbane and genteel country of Austria. Once again defining true liberty for us downtrod , muzzled Americans forced to genuflect at the odious altar of George the Bo-Nevolent.

And really, what has Austria given to the world in the last 200+ years?

• Austria-Hungary. When they took over Hungary, they didn't want to come up with a new name like Austrungria or Haustria. They just jammed a fuckin' hyphen in there.
• Hitler. Sweet, sweet Hitler...
  
• The song Edelweiss.
• Champion winter olympians with odd names containing lots of consonants and not enough vowels...(see Hackl, Krankl, Goetschl, Schiegl, Strobl et al...).

So let's give it up for Austria, where they stand behind their Free?press and cannot, COULD NOT, WILL NOT consider an apology for publishing some crazy Mohammed cartoons. But they still toss some old dude in the can for questioning history.

Am I the only one who thinks it's odd?